All my life, and I’m sure all of yours too, I’ve heard these words, “You know that they say...”. Following that is typically a peice of advice, wantes or unwanted. They say, if you hold your baby too much he‘ll become a spoiled child. They say, you’ll never have good sleep again. They say, your life will no longer be your own. They say, It’s the best thing you’ll ever do. They say, They say, They say.
I’ve come to realize ”They” say a lot of things. Some of it is good. Some of it is annoying. Most of “Them” are well meaning, attempting to connect with you. Believing they are helping and encouraging you in some way. The truth is, “They”, anyone, or anything can not prepare you for what creating a family will feel and be like. What they don’t tell you about is all of the magic and wonder, as well as responsibility hits you like a ton of bricks.
After having my son, all of these new mom feelings became very clear and made sense. Love, Joy, Wonder, and Excitement but also Concern, Necessary Strength, and Anxiety. You don’t realize that you are about to have the best feelings and moments of your life. Gushing over this small thing that at the same time is your entire world. Those same feelings all at once become overwhelming, realizing that all you want to do is give not only the best of yourself but the best that this life has to offer to your tiny amazing human. Racking your brain on how you can accomplish just that.
There will still be days that I compare myself to what others say or do. I’m slowly learning to trust myself.
“...and she loved a little boy very very much, even more than she loved herself.” -Shel Silverstein